Forced Family, Forced Fun, and Forced Fed

/

RH Buffet 2015

It's Rosh Hashanah time again! 

For all you Jebliers (Jesus fans) out there that means today is the Jewish New Year and the start of our holiday season. It's one of two times a year you have to go all American Ninja Warrior at temple to get a seat. 

Unfortunately this year I am not physically close enough to my blood family to force them into eating my food and pushing my Jew-bulousness (Jew Fabulousness) upon them. I am also not physically near my Jew Bestie Forever and her family to get my Russian Jew fix. 

Fortunately for me I am in a living situation surrounded by new friends who are willing to eat whatever I put in front of them with the promise of alcohol. So this year I forced all my new Southern friends to come over to my pied a terre where I filled what little counter space with all the cheeses. All of them.

This week I spent my down time scouring cookbooks and stalking middle aged female celebrity chefs online. Then two days ago I had a Me Moment with my platters. I hadn't spent any one on one time with my platters for months. So like a good 80's romantic evening I lit some candles, put on a Carly Simon album, poured a La Croix, and reacquainted myself with all my favorite lovers. After a few hours I totally started to understand the point of view of the mother from Flowers in The Attic. Some of my lovers ended up back in the pantry with the promise to see the light of a buffet table at a later date.

Starting early on Saturday I got to work with what I feel covers everything a Southern Jew Rosh Hashanah Brunch needs. Needless to say finding smoked salmon options in a medium sized Southern non coastal city was not easy. There was one. It wasn't bad.

I filled all my baking dishes and sheet pans (and my mouth periodically). Ran the dishwasher twice and wrapped up a few episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation. All in all a productive day. 

The menu ended up with the following: 

Smoked Salmon and Dill Quiche with Feta

Cinnamon Kugel

Traditional Challah Bread

Deviled Eggs

Mini Honey Bundt Cakes

Meat and Cheese Platter (Pimento Cheese included)

Spring Green Pomegranate Salad with Almond Halva Dressing

To recap I will say for being the only Jew in the room I was very pleased to be able to share this New Year with the kids at Melrose Place. However my new goal is to get @crazyjewishmom to find me a new Jewish doctor who still has a mother around to cook a Rosh Hashanah meal for me. 

Curds, Turds, and Herds: You Can Always Come Home

/

 

It's that time of the year again! This morning I woke up extra early. Slipped into my anti chafing underwear. Put on my walking shoes. And then made SAGL drive me to the Minnesota State Fair because I really am too delicate to fight traffic so early in the day. 

We arrived bright eyed with fists full of cash to test the waistbands of our tastefully chosen state fair ensembles.

With early crowds of diehards around us we enjoyed a wonderful breakfast of Meatloaf Hash with Scrambled Eggs and a Bearnaise sauce. Totally worth a stop. And while you are in that neighborhood I suggest you just buy a Frozen Gain Belt Blu right away. Even if it is only 9 am. Really it's a breakfast juice with all those blueberries. You just need to be 21+ to drink it.

As you saunter your way along the tree lined streets, rubbing sweaty sunscreen stained shoulders with fellow Minnesotans you might find yourself back at the old standard cheese curd stand. This year they've upped the ante and now give us the option to buy the jumbo bucket. For some reason SAGL said we couldn't. I stopped talking to him for a few hours. Or until he suggested we chase the curds with Tom Thumb Mini Donuts.

At this point Just Joni and Sister arrived. Thankfully they needed a blueberry beer to start the journey. So I joined in.

We then quickly made our way to the 4H building where the real entertainment is. Every year we make a point to take in the 4H song and dance show. It's a little bit of Waiting For Guffman meets Drop Dead Gorgeous. Those kids work for days making costumes and lifting hearts of all the grandparents sitting in the stands. I suggest showing up for the last five minutes, watching the finale and then...watch the real talent. 

Outside the 4H building we found Alive And Kickin: These Seniors Rock. Imagine your great grandfather singing "Bohemian Rhapsody". It was amazing. Worth my flight back from North Carolina. Worth binge eating so much I was afraid to fart. Worth the questionable water in the bathroom sinks. If you live in Minnesota find this group and see them. 

After our show we had to get back on the food train. Over the next few hours we accomplished the following:

Fried Pimento Cheese Sticks at O'Gara's：Tasty but no need for the hot sauce that comes along with it

Mini Donut Crunch Ice Cream with Butter Queen Coffee Izzy at The Hamiline Church：　Butter Queen is new this year. It's not fancy. Just coffee ice cream.

Oslo And Korean Tacos at Shanghaied Henri's：SAGL and I were torn about this. I loved the Oslo with lingonberry sauce. And he loved the Korean with a kick.

Margarita's at Cafe Carib：It was more sticky than a night at the gay bar in August so an iced drink was just needed. 

Cowboy Bites at Frontier Saloon：Probably my favorite hit of the season. Usually I'm suspicious of balls that leave a lingering taste in my mouth. But these fried balls of heat and cheese are welcome back anytime.

 

For or a good time check out my past state fair shenanigans! 

 State Fair 2012

 State Fair 2013

 State Fair 2014

Yes and Yes Book Club: The Devil In The White City

/

It's that time of the month again when you can find me loitering over at the fabulous Yes and Yes spouting off about books and food! This month it's serial killers and brownies. Two of my more favorite topics to get deep about.

Check it out HERE!

Road Trips, Rory Gilmore, and (Future) Rugged Mountain Husband's

/

Grit Skillet with Homemade Ginger and Sage Sausage from Over Yonder (Valle Crucis, NC).

Yesterday I found myself riding with the top down, scarf on my head, over-sized sunglasses protecting my baby blues, driving through the beautiful High Country mountains of North Carolina. 

Okay only part of that was true. 

I was on a day trip to some mountain towns in western North Carolina. But I was mildly gassy, my Ray-Bans were smudged and the Nissan top does not come down. And it was more than beautiful. I'm 8 months into my new life here in Winston-Salem and I have only recently begun to travel outside of the city limits. Winston-Salem has enough to offer me (booze and food) that I haven't yet felt the need to break free. However, yesterday I was called upon to travel West like many of my kind before me. 

I landed in Valle Crucis, NC. Home of the locally famous Mast General Store chain found here in North Carolina. And also home to Over Yonder restaurant. Picture any restaurant you would imagine Logan would have taken Rory to on Gilmore Girl's if he wanted her to feel comfortable. Located in the "Hard" Taylor House built in 1861 you can't help but awkwardly tell the waitress you plan to never leave as your grit skillet with homemade ginger and sage sausage is served to you on the back deck overlooking a koi pond that's adjacent to the garden, that's nestled on the hill overlooking the valley that makes you want to leave all your belongings behind and just start life new with nothing but your cast iron skillet and a couple pounds of butter.

After the waitress asked if I wanted my 12th coffee refill I decided it best to just lay down and roll down the drive over to the original Mast General Store. Originally opened in 1883 this general store has sold everything from caskets to the North Face. Plus you can still get a $.05 cup of coffee. Not to forget the entertainment of locals on the back porch singing old mountain songs. 

Added bonus - everyone in the mountains seems to be hot. Not it has been a long time hot, but why hasn't Mode Magazine been up here yet to snag that man behind the counter for future shenanigans with Betty and Mark? Like I said...all I need is my cast iron skillet, a couple pounds of butter, and now my empty ring finger for that rugged mountain husband.

I hope you enjoy the pictures from my day trip below!

 

The Dead Dad's Club

/
Dumplings and Bean with Bacon Soup

Dumplings and Bean with Bacon Soup

A NOTE:
Below is a post from awhile back. I find myself reading it once a year on Father's Day. So I am going to share it once again. And you will probably see it next year around this time as well. It's a damn good recipe.

Today’s post is going to be short. It is a holiday for many and I assume there are meats being bought, hot dishes being prepared, and Jell-O salads firming in the ice box.

This is the time of year I steer clear of the card aisles, ignore the barrage of promotional emails that filter in daily and make a concentrated effort to not ask my co-workers what they have planned for the weekend.

Today is Father’s Day and I’m a card carrying member of The Dead Dad’s Club. Though the name of our club sounds harsh it is our way of memorializing our fathers. Most of us in the club agree our fathers had a sense of humor to support our sardonic group name.

We formed innocently enough one night over beers. The Fates had found it necessary to bring together different circles of friends that once seated and stories told realized they formed a human Venn Diagram whose common space was our departed fathers.

That night, though nothing was said, we had our own Hallmark-less, cookout-less, present-less, and fatherless Father’s Day. I will not speak for everyone at that table but I imagine for a split second we all held a mental memorial for the men who were half responsible for making us.

This Father’s Day I will spend time thinking of the men who taught us to make soup, who could play a mean accordion, who proudly served our country, who filled a station wagon full of kids and travelled cross country, who stopped to make history by being photographed on a toilet in the middle of a field, who built a log home, who could light up any room with his electrical skills, who took us to our first psychic reading, who made historical societies cool, and who knew that even after he was gone could make a difference to a medical school.

So this week’s recipe is dedicated to my father, Just J. In my mind this is a family recipe. It very well could have come from Good Housekeeping decades back. But only my father could make it a real family delicacy. It’s a simple soup. From a store bought can. But made to taste homemade because of who taught me to make it.

Just J’s Bean with Bacon Soup (aka Dumps)

Feeds me for about two days. Or a family of four for one meal