You will not believe this when you read it but I actually got stopped in the mall by a reader. Well maybe less stopped in the mall and more I saw someone (Ms. D) I know who reads this blog and I yelled her name with reckless abandon until she turned around and acknowledged me. Anyway we got to talking (praising my blog as I badgered her with questions while she tried to stop the mall cops on the segways) and she seemed really excited when I told her it was SUPPER SLUTS time of the month again!
This month's Host Slut was Tatz McGee. Like other Sluts in the group she has her tribal tattoos to prove her worth. Not sure what part of Anglo Saxon Europe her tribe comes from but I'm not going to mess with Tatz. Beeyotch be keeping the thorns on her artichokes. Mess with her and you might find a choke where one should not be.
On to dinner...it was fabulous. As a gay man I am at liberty to use fabulous whenever I want. And I don't whip it out for just anybody. At least lately. Last time it was only fab and when I confronted him about lying on his online dating profile it became even less. Like just "fa".
SAGL and I arrived promptly before everyone else. As Camp Counselor put it, "you two got here early to get all the good booze". She saw that I had hid the bottle of Jameson behind the winter squash. To be fair there was not a lot of Jameson left and there was only so much spiced cider to go around. When times are tough you ration. I know what bread lines in The U.S.S.R. look like.
As the remaining Sluts arrived (Irish Car Bomb, Black Kelly and White Kelly) we settled in for some tasty treats. Everyone enjoyed a cocktail. And those of us in the kitchen got a show as Camp Counselor showed us her mad b-ball skills while tossin' back some Monster Mix (you know the peanut, M&M, craisin mix that comes in the big plastic tub at Target in the aisle you go down even though there is nothing in that aisle you need but end up slowing down and thinking, "hmmmm...everything looks so good but is so bad. I'll just get the Monster Mix. It has nuts and berries in it). Well Camp Counselor was tossing some nuts into her mouth (please don't flag this blog...she really was tossing nuts in her mouth) when her great aim missed her mouth an inch away and the nut landed smack on the left side of her dirty pillow and flew right back into the giant plastic tub. While she snarfed up her mouthful of nut juice I just asked that she pass the tub. No need to drop all that Monster Mix on the floor. Even if it has seen the "backboard" that is her bossom.
Tatz McGee set us up with some hot Italian meat in buns, a nice side of coleslaw (totally from a bag and bottle but nobody noticed...until now) and mashed potatoes. Oh and the artichokes mentioned above! She was genius with the artichokes. She served two large ones in a bowl and we all just went at it Honey Boo Boo style. With just enough food to go around (including Camp Counselors Jabba The Hut portion of mashed potatoes...I don't think she even ate a meat sandwich. It was all potatoes on her plate) we wrapped up some heated political debates with a nice slice of apple pie and whipped cream. Amer-I-CAN!
|that's an extra serving of love on the side|
All in all it was a great dinner on a Thursday night. And it was a dinner I didn't have to make.
Well done Tatz.
Well done Tatz.